A diary of expression by our founder Antiqua Libbey.
Once upon a time – I did not know I was worthy of love, actually I was very committed to the belief that I would never be loved. I questioned all love that came my way. I could not/ would not believe that I was lovable, for those who where suppose to love me when I was young told me so… I could not earn, prove and talk them into loving/ being content and satisfied with me, as me…now I know this was because they had not learned how to love themselves, but as a child I believed they were right and as my aunt pointed out to me I believed what was told to me when I didn’t meet the un-meet-able expectations of a person who only expressed what I now call critical love, “that’s why no one likes you Lisha.”
I cannot imagine telling my children anything like this.
This constant pain kept me trying to earn love, prove myself to myself and everyone and no believing in the love that was shown me. In 2003 it ended my marriage, my need to be convened that i was lovable. My own belief kept me lonely. And by the time God healed my heart and let me see the blessing in my life, my love had formed his own belief and moved on emotionally. Again leaving me unseen, misunderstood, alone.
I feel blessed to get to reframe my own childhood beliefs, lies spoken over me. I also love that over the past 6 years I have had to pleasure of helping many others do the same.
Yet, no matter how much con
tentment and peace I have in my life. The gift of LOVE is still a lesson, a path, a journey I am on. As my marriage officially ends, and he could never prove to me he loved him and I never could prove to him my worth, we all lost.
Over the past 5 years as I have grown to know myself as a Divine Child, to walk my path and learn new ways of expressing myself. I have slipped many times back into my own beliefs each time revealing a gift to heal them on a deeper more subtle level.
So my prayer is to one day be fully open trusting love, a man’s love, a parents love, a friends love, God’s love because I am lovable, I am liked and I am worthy, I am a child of God.
If you have ever been told you did not measure up to be lovable, did not meet the standard of whatever it takes to be liked. I want to tell you. That is the darkness talking trying to keep you down, because the TRUTH is you are born as LOVE, born CONNECTED, born WORTH…you have nothing to prove and there is nothing that needs to be proven to you. Love is who you are. Join me and fall in love with who you are body, mind and soul – all over again or for the first time ever in Divine in 9.
https://www.yourownuniversity.org or http://www.Divinein9.com
